Australian Comedy Treasures: Exploring The Wit Of Kath And Kim Quotes

We’ve got some of the most famous Kath And Kim Quotes immersed in the hilarious world for you where you can enjoy the classic back-and-forth between beloved couple, Kath and Kim. This Aussie favorite features a variety of different moments that truly captures the essence of its characters. From unforgettable moments of Kath’s adorable charm to Kim’s unique words of wisdom, these quotes offer a delightful glimpse into the show’s clever humour. Join the laughs and reconnect with the comedic geniuses of ‘Kath & Kim’ through their unforgettable quotes.

Kath And Kim Quotes

👉 “I Just Want To Make A Little Speech Here, Just To Fill Some Time. I Look Around The Room Today And See People I Barely Know And I Think: Wow, That’s Beautiful.” Use When: You Need To Fill The Awkward Silence As Everyone Logs Onto The Big, All-Office Zoom Meeting. 👈

👉 “Well, I Wasn’t. So, Get Your Facts Straight Before You Start Accusing People Of Being Tiddly, Ploise.” Use When: You’ve Had A Bit Too Much To Drink And You Need To Defend Yourself The Next Day. 👈

👉 “Everyone’s So Self-Obsessed, Am I The Only One Around Here Thinking About Me?” Use When: You’ve Got The Iso Blues And Are In Need Of A Little Attention.👈

👉 Trude: Why, Flick’s Like That; She Doesn’t Think! I Mean, She And Jeff Are Grayshsh, And I Love Seeing Them At Noorrsa… Prue: Yes, But Down Here She Is Just Too Full-On. 👈

👉 Trude: Oh, That Reminds Me — That Little Man From Beechtree And Sons Is Coming Over To Talk Hoihurba. Prue: Oh God, I Hope He’s Surba. Oh, We’ve Got Stacks Of Hoihurba Left Urva From Octurba! (Sees Kath And Kim) You All Right There? Trude Or Are You Just Happy Brahzing? 👈

👉 Prue: How About Something In Your Bodum? Kim: I Beg Yours! Prue: A Plunger In Your Bodum’s Always Nice. And It Comes With These Matching Cups Which Are Cyuuute. Kim: Nuh. Prue: How About Nigella Oliver’s Newie? It’s The Box Set! It’s Got New Food, Screwed Food, Rude Food And Nude Food… Kim: Nuh. 👈

👉 Kath: Awww, Little Epponnee-Rae, It’s Alright Darling, Epponnee Raelene Charlene Kathleen Darlene Craig. You Are Getting More And More Like Your Boo-Tiful Granny As The Days Go By. Look At Her Hair, Kimmie, It’s Getting A Nice Frizz To It! Kim: Oh, Don’t Wish That On Her! Although, I Do Think, Luckily, Personality-Wise She’s Going To Be Like Me. 👈

👉 Kim: Mum, Your Pants Are Split. Kath: Oh, No, I Just Bought These Lovely Latte Capris. They Must Have Shrunk In The Wash. Kim: No, I Think This Time You’re The One Stacking On The Kilos! I Think For Once, The Mule Is On The Other Foot. Kath: You’re The Mule, You Stupid Girl. Kath: I Told King Henry VIII To Get Knotted. Me And Kel Are Happy To Do It On The Front Lawn! 👈

👉 “Look, I Just Feel I Have So Many Options, R.E: The Venue At The Moment; You Know Ive Got Big Jugs On One Hand, Ive Got Dirty Nellys On The Other, And Now Ive Got King Henry VIII Constantly On My Back! .” – Kath 👈

👉 Kim: Look At Me, Mum, Don’t You Think I Look Like Britney Spears? Kath: Yes, You Do, You Do, You Look Like Her Sister, Asparagus. Asparagus Spears, Geddit?👈

👉 Kel: What Is So Wrong With Two Baby-Boomers Getting It On For A Photo While We’re Still Both Incredibly Fit? 👈

👉 Kim: [In A Flash-Forward 20 Years, To An Offscreen Epponnee-Rae.] Epponnee, Hurry Up! And Don’t Forget Your Fake-Tan. 👈

👉 Brett: “(Talking About Epponnee) She Could Be Prime Minister…” Kim: “I’m Thinking Bigger Than That, Brett. She Could Be On Neighbours!” 👈

👉 Kath: No Kiss, No Coach, No Kiss, No Coach, It Was Like A Nightmare! Kim: Why Didn’t Just Kiss Him? 👈

👉 “Oh, It’s A Crime Against Humanity To Keep This Locked Up.” Use When: You Get Dressed Up To Go To The Living Room And You Just Can’t Believe The World Isn’t Seeing It. 👈

👉 “You Look Like A Bit Of A Fashion Victim.” Use When: Someone In Your Life Has Completely Forgotten How To Dress For The Outside World. Tip: If Said To You, Reply, “Thank You, I Do Try.” 👈

👉 “The Sooner You Realise All Men Are Bastards And Develop An Interest In Sport, The Happier You’ll Be.” Use When: Someone In Your Life Is Pining For The Freer, Pre-Lockdown Days Of Dating. 👈

👉 “Tonight’s Tea’s Done, So I Might Get Cracking On Tomorrow Night’s Tea.” Use When: You’re Really Getting Into The Home Cooking And Just Need Something To Do. 👈

👉 “I Like To Keep Myself Trim Kim. Does It Make Me A Crim To Keep Myself Trim?” Use When: You’re Copping Flack For Your At-Home Workout Ventures. 👈

👉 “You Know What I Miss, Mum? Going To The Pub And Getting Literally Legless.” Use When: You’ve Lost Touch With Reality And Track Of The Days Since Your Last Parma. 👈

👉 “Will I Go Now? What Have I Got On Tomorrow? Nothing. Right, I Better Go Now.” Use When: You’re Trying To Decide Whether To Bake An Entire Croquembouche Today Or Tomorrow Afternoon. No Brainer. 👈

👉 “I’m Not A Housewife, I’m A Hornbag.” Use When: You Want To Skimp On Cleaning Duties So You Can Have A Hinge Binge. 👈

👉 “Let It Go Kath, Let It All Go. Empty Your Mind. Empty Your Mind. Empty? Oh, That Was Quick.” Use When: There’s Nothing Up Here Anymore. Nothing. Empty. That Was Quick 👈

👉 Prue: I Was Furious, Trude, Because She Knew We Had The Stockbrokers-In-Crisis Polo Picnic, And We Had To Make Thirty Mini Goats’ Cheese Pizzas!👈

👉 Kim: I’ve Still Got A Thumping Headache. I’m Never Drinking Again. Kath: More Bailey’s, Kim? Kim: Yes, Thanks.👈

👉 Sharon: Where Pacifically In The Specific Were You Gonna Go, Mrs D.? 👈

👉 Kim: Stupid Sharon! (To Epponnee Rae) Mummy Is A Hornbag, Isn’t She? Epponnee Rae: Nuh… Kim: You Little B – (Brightens) You Said Your First Word! 👈

👉 “I Just Wanna Go Bush, You Know, Somewhere Off The Beaten Track … Like Noosa.” Use When: You Just Really, Really, REALLY Want A Holiday. Anywhere. At. All. 👈

👉 “Mum??!? What Happened To All Of My Care Bears????” Use When: You’ve Spent A Lil Too Much Time Getting Your Home-Office-In-Your-Bedroom Juuuuuust Right. 👈

👉 “You Know, I Didn’t Realise Jesus Was So Buff. Spunk.” Use When: You’re More Than A Little Bit, Um, Frustrated. 👈

👉 Kath: Do You Have Flutes In Your Orrefors? (Pronounced Like Orifice) Trude: Yes! I Do. Kath: Right, I’ll Take Two Of Those. 👈

👉 Kim: I’m Not Criticising You, Mum. I’m Just Saying You Look Bad! 👈

👉 “You Know It’s Really Good You Called Me Today, I Was Flat Out Killing Time At Home” – Sharon 👈

👉 “Well, Its Air Evidently, Kimmy. You Eat Air For Two Weeks, And Then Red Meat For Two Weeks, So It All Balances Out! .” – Kath 👈

👉 “Oh No Kim, Monogamy’s Very Old Fashioned. You Just Want A Veneer Of Monogamy.That’s All People Care About These Days” – Kath 👈

👉 I’m Not Saying It’s You That Looks Bad; It’s Your Dress That Makes You Look Like A Frump. – Sharon “Bloody Bolton Bitches!” -Kim 👈

👉 “You Think Brett Is The Bee’s Knees. Well Let Me Tell You, Mum, Bee’s Knees Are Hard To Live With 24/7!” -Kim 👈

👉 “The Best Latte In Town Is Less Than 30 Mins Power Walk At The Award Winning Croutons On The Bay. Talk About Convenience!” – Kath 👈

👉 “Oh Nooo, I’m Gonna Be Good. Just An Artichooorke & A Diet Cooooorke.” 👈

👉 “Kel And I Have Decided To Make Our Beautiful And Sensual Relationship A Mere Formality.” – Kath 👈

👉 “Flowers Aren’t A Present Brett, They’re A Garnish” – Kath 👈

👉 “You’re The Wings Beneath My Wind.” – Kath 👈

👉 “You Look Like A Fashion Victim, Kim.” – Sharon 👈

👉 “I Am High Maintenance, But I Think You Gotta Be. I’m Proud Of My Home, Ditto Myself….” – Kath 👈

👉 “Brett, I’m Gonna Make You Your Favourite Meal Tonight – Rack Off Lamb.” – Kath 👈 👈

👉 “You Know Your Beeswax? Why Don’t You Mind It?” – Kath 👈

👉 “I Like To Keep Myself Trim, Kim. Does It Make Me A Crim To Keep Myself Trim?” -Kim 👈

👉 “I Just Want To Look Groovy” – Sharon 👈

👉 “You Think Brett Is The Bees Knees. Well Let Me Tell You, Mum, Bees Knees Are Hard To Live With 24/7! .” -Kim 👈

👉 “I Spilled By Latteeee On My Duuveeet.” Prue Knewwww. 👈

👉 “For Your Information, I Do Have A Date! A Sticky Date!” Use When: Friends In Relationships Ask How Your Lockdown Love Life Is Going. 👈

👉 “Right, Better Get Cracking On Some Of Those Important Projects Of Mine.” Use When: You’re Trying To Get Your Mum Off Facetime So You Can Go Back To Watching The Bold Type. 👈

👉 “I’m Dying In This Townhouse.” Use When: You’re Tired Of Your Four Walls And Down To Your Last Packet Of Sakatas. 👈

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